Not Free...

No Title

Last post I said something about Lok is M.I.A ... I did give some hint on that question...
I said Lok went back to the moon...All you have to add in is just..." Lok went back to the moon to visit his father " if you all read about Lok's Introduce post you all for sure to know "WHY"

I think im too rusty for this Cafe' I cant talk cock no more...but my grandma can...
Here are some few examples of Profesional + Senior Cocking

Me:Yoh...I dont feel like eating rice today
Grandma:Dont eat rice arr? you know when we were young we have no rice to eat arr.(Talk Cock)

Me:Proton Cars arr??
Grandma:When we were young arr we dont have proton cars also la...( ==" )

Me:* Listening to music with high volume *
Grandma: Listen song arr?? when we were young we dont have song to listen arr...

Me:*Sleeping with my aircond on*
Grandma:*slap my face*
Me:*Wakes up* W.T.F ?!?!
Grandma: Sleeping with aircond arr??when we were young we dont have aircond arr..Fan also dont have...

Me:*Watching TV*
Grandma: Watch TV arr?? When we were young...Our Tv is the toilet bowl...

Me:*Going for hair cut*
Grandma: Hair cut arr?? why pay people to cut your hair arr?? Your grandmama is a professional hair stylist arr..I cut for you..
Me:==" Oooh...
Grandma: Gao Dim arr...
Me: ....


So now you know...Who is the Professional Talk c0cker ....

-Hz-

Where is Lok ??

WHERE IS LOK ???

Title says it all...many of you will wonder "Where is lok??" Why suddenly M.I.A ? ( Missing In Action ) ...

Answer:

A.He died
B.He quit this job
C.He went M.I.A
D.He lost in a big shopping complex
E.He drop down in a toilet bowl
F.He ditch this blog for something better
G.He lost inside his own pocket


Here's the story about Lok went M.I.A.

He ...... went ..... back....to......













































The




















































Moon


Here's a picture for you and me to remember him...
In the memories of Lok...Amen



-Hz-

日日有吃神

Just gona update abit...As you all know..Lok has started a topic call "日日有吃神"
Only 1 post was made...and it was a success.Dont you readers think so??
Currently Lok is not around to post this topic...so i tried to take over his place...
I just start eating every time the food are serve ....so i failed to do his job.

BUT !!!! Some one did help me on this topic...and here it is...



Is the Maggi Mee... It taste like heaven.
The only place where you can eat this is...when ur out on a trip with me in a mamak store =D.

Here is a question for the day.

What do you feel about this blog?

Answer must be post in the chat box --->
All readers must give at least 1 answer.

My answer: So far so good,My blog is looking sexy ~




-Hz-

Update ?!?! Nah !!

Helo sexy readers~~ thx for those comment u all left beind on the chat box...=D

Since today is a full moon day(I think so) I will talk about Terminator 4.

Last week while I was driving around Sri Petaling,I saw a "Terminator Wanna Be" guy doing his terminator moves alone...so I just pass by him with a weird stare..Then I found a parking and park there...and I get down from my car.After I lock my car...I saw 2 more idiot doing their Terminator Moves...@@ so total is 3 now...

I just felt like there is something wrong when I was walking to a Mamak Store...Like something is going to happen...something bad...my eyes are twitching too...Bad signal...When I was ordering my food,I felt the wind blowing towards me...It was chilling and it gives me the creep.

I saw 4 Terminator's Army walking in the mamak with style...They even walk in slow motion .=D I was like WTF !?!? "Hou Lan Yeng Arr!!!"

*Ahem* As I was saying, This 4 Terminator dude sits beside my table with steady and stif pose.
Even the Mamak dude was like =O.

Time pass every minutes and seconds...Those Terminator dude did not move at all...and they are remaining in their cool poses...When my Maggi Curry Soup came...I started eatting...and they are still not moving...

After some time...one of the dude moves his hand...I was so suprise that one of them move...and Im curious that what he is going to do,It end up the guy with red shirt just wanna dig his nose...I stare at them for a very long time (5 minutes) after my meal.

My mind was like..F&*@ it...When I tried to raise my hand...suddenly I felt someone was catching it...my exprestion was like WTF?!?!(again)
Then all of them moves to my table...I almost peed in my pants that moment...and one of them started to talk to me..the first word he said was...."Do you think we're cool? scary? or retard?"

I wanted to answer *Retard* but I was scared...so I answerd *Cool*...
They respond with a smile and started talking about their sunglasses. =="
Fucked Up Salesman !!!!

Hey but the sunglasses are cool mate...they have build in MP3 with it...If anyone is intrested can contact me...xD They are quite cheap too... Limited Stock only...



-Hz-

no talk cock?

Talk C0ck Cafe'

Hey .... do you really think every thing in Talk C0ck Cafe is full of bullshits??? Haha....not really...this time Im going to show you...Talk C0ck Cafe dont only bullshit...but all thing picture is from "The Star"





















So...many of you might ask this question...Is this true...?? Because this is Talk C0ck Cafe...the place where we bullshit around...
No doubt...this is a true story...how can "The Star" give us fake news ?? rite??

Oh yea...We just found out that our Duckman !!! is working for WWE .... He is "TheUndertaker.."

Wow...we plan to hunt him down...but..WTF ?!? he is "The Undertaker"!!!
Ah Lok...maybe if you see this post..you can hunt him down man...

And the last thing for today is....












Wait !!!













For !!!!

















IT !!!!!































































































Lol...Wtf...Thx for supporting Talk C0ck Cafe'
Leave a comment by the chat box...=)


-Hz-

talk c0ck sesion

Hey guys and girls out there...Have you spotted the Duckman yet??We are still on a run of catching this villain..This is the lates update...Here is Duckman without his costume....
[This is a classic picture]

Ok...this is another thing that all of you guys and girls have to becareful of...mostly guys...
Here is how it gose...Hitz.FM is having an event...and to win...you have to find the Hitz.FM Fugitive in the public...ask anyone with this question.."Are you the Hitz.FM Fugitive???"if your lucky you might win up to RM100k....so I though why not give is a shot...is no harm asking ...so I started with my MSN first...this is my first and last person to ask...
[Enlarge it to get a better view..]



This is like...Hey !! WTF man...Im a dude...and ur a dude...I dont do Dicks...

There is like f@#$ing lots of news now a days...so damn happening...Here are few steps of things that you all need to do to get update...

1.Walk or Drive to your nearest 7-11...
2.Get out RM1.30 from wallet or pocket..or somwhere else
3.Go get a "The Star" newspaper..throw it at the counter..and ask "B for Berapa"(repeat 3x)
4.Then pay him...

Thats all...Very simple rite??

Todays lesson is...beware of gays...F^%$!!!


-Hz-

Valentine Special 2

Valentine Special 2

He has made a final decision , He has invited the girl to his house to celebrate his birthday on his birthday party...The boy though of suprising her with something special in his birthday...So,now every one of his invited friends has reach... but not the girl...he felt very down...and very emo...but he knows that anyhow the party have to go on... so he continue waitting and waitting and waitting for the arrival of his dream girl...but still there is no sgin of her...Now, is the time to cut the cake..at this moment all the guest is singing the birthday song to him....and he just hopes that the one singing the birthday song for him is his dream girl...So here comes the wish making time...He close his eyes and wish that the girl is infront of him and wish that she will be his girlfriend soon...and he also wish for a bigger penis(Added)...While he open his eyes...the first thing he saw is a pair of Boobs...and he look further and saw his dream girl !!! Wow...so he tought that the 1st wish came true...so he tought maybe the 2nd wish will come true too...so he quickly go under the table and grab his suprise flower and knee down infront of her and ask " Will You Be My Girl Friend?" while holding a bunch of flowers in his hand...

The girl was so touch and she agree immediately ... So while he was dating with her the 2nd day...suddenly... something pops up of his mind...*my 1st and 2nd wish came true...Will my 3rd wish come true to impress her????*
Months and months has pass...and their relationship is still perfect...and he keeps thinking that when will his 3rd wish come true...Finally...one day he realise that his penis got bigger...and he planning to impress her with pleasure that day...so he send her a short massage and said *Baby Chin Chin...tonight..my house...at 8 * * Winks* ...
Not long later...while he is preparing for a sweet romantic and horny surrounding ... the phone rang...^Xi suo suo Xi suo suo ~~Wut Wut^ and he pick up...her first word was..."lets break up..I have no feel with you anymore...lets not meet up anymore"*hang up* * dududu...*..he cant even say a single word...he felt so emo that time... he nearly killed him self that day...but he knows that dying for a girl is not worth it ...so he went to a pub and ordered a 7 Terquilla...he kept drinking and drinking and drinking...until he gets drunk...while he was floting home...he say his ex-girlfriend and DUCKMAN !!! hugging,kissing and holding hands together near the pub..He got so mad and turn GREEN !!! and shouted " GRRRRR IMA DA HULK !!! " he ran to Duckman and give Duckman a Green punch ~~Duckman did not fight back...and responed with his Invisibility skill...( shuk chun ) and grab his girlfriend's arm and ran off...he felt so emo and turn human again...he was so !@#% pissed off , he went back to the club and get a bottle of vodka and drank it just like this... THE WHOLE BOTTLE ?!?!?! Finally he got so drunk and fall at the middle of the road...

A drunk driver was speeding and did not notice him and....(imgagine your self)
And now we pray in the memories of "HIM" that he died on 25/12/85 ...Amen...

The End

-Lokzai-
-Harryzai-

Valentine Special

Valentine Special

Valentine has pass...but there is still other Valentine day.. for example today...is Moonlight Valentine day... and yesterday was Chicken's Valantine day... tomorrow is Zues's Valentine day...
So,we are going to talk about a Valentine story on this Moonlight Valentine Day =)
This story is very romantic and touching ..it is about a boy who show us the meaning of true love...

Once upon a time , there was a student who always get bullied...every time he pass by in the canteen he will be bullied by a bunch of his students...even a student younger then him bullied him...what a pity...and one day , there is a new student who is a girl which is also his classmate...and she dosent know this boy well...One day...while he was buying food and get push by a student...that dosent admit he did...so this new girl saw that this boy is getting bullied and she quickly run to the Big bully and scold him...and she help him up...As time pass... they get closer and closer...and finally this boy feel that he has fall in love with this heroic girl...so he start to think alot...and he finally decided to date her...his first idea is to impress her with his coolness...So, one day he went to a student name Sher-Lok a.k.a Siu Loong Bao and try to bully him ... and he got " Ta Pau " and he is lucky that the girl was not there to see how he got " Ta Pau " ... So he continue running his plan , and his second plan is to do something...and so on and so on... he tried many time and fail ...she dosent seem to be impress at all...So one day he just went to her with a bunch of flower and ask her to be his girlfriend...and she rejected him...He felt very unsatisfied and he kept trying and trying and trying ... till now...So far he has tried about...365 times ?? I guess , I lost count on that...And finally one day, He has ......

To Be Continue....

-LokZai-
-HarryZai-

osama's son

Osama's Son Scandal

One day while I was surfing the internet....I saw something very intresting...so i will share it with you all...

I can not believe it that Osama's Son is a Sunsilk model....he helps sunsilk do to advertisment ..and also James Bond 2 in 1 model...is really unbeliveable...

See the differents? and I also found out the story about him,from some blog call ... www.talkc0ckcafe.blogspot.com ...

Heres how the story gose :-

One day..while he was walking by the street...the Moon Guy pass by him and stoped him...and then...tell him that his hair is terrible...so the Moon Guy introduce him to use the product name "Sunsilk" so he listen to the Moon Guy and bought a bottle of Sunsilk shampoo...after using it,he felt very refreshing and the feel of virgin hair is back....so he went to show off his virgin hair at Taman Desa...suddenly a woman saw his beautiful virgin hair and start going towards him...she asked him to help her advertise a product name Rejoyce... but he refuse..because he felt sorry that he is not advertising for the right product...so he recommand the old women that he wants to advertise for Sunsilk...and the woman told him that she is under JamesBond and she ask him if he agrees that he advertise for 2 in 1 advertisment...and he accept the deal with just a snap of his finger...The next day he went to the company and take photos...He have to pose like JamesBond and show his virgin hair...Not long later , this advertisement come out and alot of reportes ask him whats the secret to get this silky,shiny and beutiful hair?? He just answer with a word...Sunsilk and giving his famouse JamesBond pose ... The thing is... no body knows that he is drunk while taking this picture...This advertisment has been ban after a few month because...alot of people die of laughing ... and some pretty girls got jelouse of his virgin hair...they went commite suicide...what a waste....Thats how this story ends...

*P/S* for those pretty girls who is jelouse of his hair, please dont commite suicide ...call me..dont watse your life dying..is no point...is better to wastes your life with me...I can make your life more exciting ... xD

-LokZai-

What not to do

What Not To Do In a Elevator

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly.
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on.
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.


-HarryZai-